"Lex, why are you looking at my goat?"
"Sparky and I have a future, Clark."
"You so better be kidding."
"Oh, definitely. I mean Christ, Clark. Goat."
"Okay then. Come on, Mom made pie."
"Sounds great, Clark."
"Lex, are you coming?"
"I refuse to answer that. You'll just make a pun."
"Would I try to get your goat, Lex?."
"You country people are strange and frightening."
"But you love me anyway."
"Yeah. And your mom's pie."
"Bastard."
Clark stared at Sparky, watching as the goat chewed the surprisingly green for winter-in-Kansas grass. "What did he see in you, Sparky?"
"Clark, why are you talking to the goat?"
"Oh, hi, Mom. I was just wondering... Did you ever think that dad loved the farm more than he loved you?"
"Well, once, when he wouldn't leave the cucumber patch... Ummm.. never mind. What is this about?"
"Lex was fascinated by Sparky."
"Well, he is a wonderful goat, Clark. You did a wonderful job breeding him. Lex probably wants to know your secret."
"Lex knows all my secrets. I think he's after my goat."
"Luthors always try to get Kent goats, Lex. It's a thing."
"I'm not talking metaphor, Mom."
"Me either. Lionel Luthor and your father had a falling out about a goat your father raised."
"Really? Is that why they don't like each other? Because Mr Luthor got dad's goat?"
"Exactly."
"I'd give Lex the goat, you know. If he asked."
"Just don't give up the goat too quickly, Clark."
"Yes, Mom."
Mother and son watched as Sparky continued to chew, his goatness completely unimpressed by the humans.
Driving fast made up for a lot of things, Lex had discovered at an early age. He gunned the engine of his new Porsche and flew down the Five. His monthly pilgrimage to his father's house in Metropolis. His monthly accounting.
Having to report in now annoyed him, he had woken to Clark's head on his shoulder and a large hand entangled with his own. Having to drive his lover home so he could catch the school bus was probably one of the things about this relationship that he shouldn't focus on.
He had almost gotten Clark's goat the night before, but Clark and Sparky had apparently reached a decision that no goats would be gotten before sex. So instead of a goat, which Lex admitted, he was intrigued by, he had gotten Clark.
A much better deal, in many ways.
Still, he wanted to get Clark's goat.
It was a ... calling in his blood.
Kent. Goat. Get.
He had gotten the Kent, but the goat still eluded him.
Reaching the Metropolis estate, Lex parked in the garages and headed up to his father's office. The housekeeper met him in the hall, only to tell him that his father had been delayed. Lex thanked her and decided to wait in the office anyway. He could always try to break into his father's computer, just for giggles and grins.
The computer hadn't been much of a challenge, and the knowledge that his father was about to buy another Major Corporation in Singapore was interesting, but not to the exile of Crapville.
Logging off, Lex stood up and walked to the window, looking out. Settling his hands in his pockets, he leaned back on his heels. Deciding he'd rather explore than be bored, he headed to the door off the office, wondering if his father had remodeled again.
The room was bare, only a wooden cabinet sitting against a wall. The cabinet looked vaguely familiar. It hit Lex a second later. It was the same kind of set up Amy had had, back in Smallville.
A feeling of trepidation, but Lex opened the small double doors.
Pictures of a brown goat.
A picture of Jonathan Kent and his father, shaking hands, sincere smiles on both of their faces. A few candles, and more pictures of the goat.
Oh, god, Lex thought. It was in the blood, this interest in getting goats.
Or his father had abandoned the Episcopal Church to join Santeria.
"Hello, Lex." He jumped at the sound of his father's voice.
The sound of his father's voice, combined with the little goat-stalking altar he was currently looking at, made Lex a little nervous. "Hey, Dad."
"I don't think you are supposed to be in here, Lex."
"That makes sense." Lex closed the little doors and turned around. His father looked perfectly calm, which was probably a good thing.
"Time to get down to business, Lex." Lionel led the way into his study, throwing his long coat over a chair. He took out a few file folders and tossed them across the meeting table to Lex.
A few hours later, after being suitably reamed and read his father's standard riot acts for encouraging the misuse of paperclips and toilet paper, Lex had fond hopes of finally getting back to Smallville.
"Lex."
He looked back at his father, who was lolling back in his chair, his silver pen glinting in the light as he flipped it over his fingers.
"Always be sure you get the goat, Lex."
"I don't know..."
"Sometimes it's business, sometimes..." Lionel looked at him from under his brows, and Lex knew for certain that Lionel knew about his relationship with Clark. "... it's pleasure. But you always need to get their goat, Lex. It's an uphill battle with a Kent."
"Dad, I'm sure that when the time comes..."
"Lex, you need to learn to trust my judgment about such things. Get the goat, then you'll see how the other turns out."
Lex didn't inform Lionel about his feelings about Lionel's judgment. If Lionel wanted to ignore the fruits of his own judgment, especially regarding Victoria and the penicillin shots, well, that was his business.
"I'll look into it, Dad."
"See that you do, Lex. See that you do."
With that, Lex headed to his car. If he drove faster than usual, he could be back at the farm by dinner.
Quality, and goat getting time, were hard to come by.
The sofa in his haymow retreat was courtesy of the Johanssen's, who had moved to Metropolis a few months ago. On his way to school, for once having caught the school bus, Clark had seen a 'Take Please, Free', sign on the sofa, a matching red naugahyde chair, and a table.
By the time the school bus was taking them home, the table had disappeared but the sofa and chair were still there. In the middle of the night, Clark had returned and picked up the sofa and zipped it home first, then returned and grabbed the chair.
Now, more than a year later, the naugahyde just a little worse for wear, Clark was ever grateful that he had.
He was stretched out on his side, his back against the back of the sofa, his arms around Lex, trying to wrap his mind around the latest weirdness.
That this weirdness had nothing to do with being attracted to, and craving sex with, a certain young, bald, multimillionaires who happened to be male, was a relief.
"So, the goat thing, it's like genetic?"
Lex ran his fingers over Clark's hand, which was resting on his black sweater-clad chest. "Well, not really. It's more just a little loopy. But the whole thing seems to be familial in origin."
"Ah." Clark found a nipple under the sweater and began to gently run the pads of his fingertips over it. "Okay, what do we do about it?"
Lex shifted back on his hip, pushing his ass closer to Clark's groin, smiling when Clark stiffened in more ways than one. "Maybe I should..." Lex wrapped his hand around Clark's other hand, letting the nipple rubbing continue. "... borrow Sparky for a few days?"
Clark squeezed the hand in his. "You want to get my goat, but temporarily."
"Yeah."
"Lex, what exactly do you know about goat-care?"
"It's not rocket science, Clark. I feed it, give it a place to sleep, polish it's horns."
Clark bit back a laugh at the mental image of Lex pollishing Sparky's little horns. Strangely, the image was arousing, too.
"And what exactly would you feed him?"
Letting go of Clark's hand, Lex turned in his arms, his stormy blue eyes amused as they looked into Clark's. "Goat Chow?"
Clark let the laugh go, his body shaking as he laughed, one large hand pulling Lex's hips closer to his own. "Goat Chow?"
Lex gave him a disgruntled look. "Come on, there has to be something like that out there."
Clark was still laughing as he leaned down, his mouth finding Lex's, pulling him into a deep, wet kiss.
They were both a little dazed when they parted, time seeming to stand still, the moment fraught with need and want.
"Lex?"
"Hmm?"
"Bahhh..."
Lex stopped him the only way he could think of --
-- he pulled those warm lips back to his as his hands found buttons buried in yards of flannel.
Clark pulled the truck around to the back entrance of Luthor Manor and pulled up near the path that led around to the back courtyard. Getting out, he went to the rear of the truck and opened the gate. Wrapping his fingers around the wires of the cage that sat in the bed, he pulled it to the edge and looking around, picked it up. He easily balanced the large cage and followed the path to the courtyard.
Turning the corner, he gawked as he put the cage down.
Almost half the terrace had been fenced in with an attractive gold lattice designed metal fence with an ornate gate. There was what Clark could call a pagoda, little goats, in oxidizing bronze perched at the corners of the top tier. Surrounding the pagoda was a huge expanse of field grasses. There were two grape vines growing out of large containers.
"Hey, Clark."
"Lex, this is ... amazing," Clark said, turning around to look at Lex, dressed in his usual black, wearing purple lensed sunglasses. Kneeling, Clark opened the cage and gently pulled Sparky out, holding him close so he couldn't fuss and hurt himself.
Lex was watching him closely. "Yeah, found the fencing and the pagoda up in one of the attics. I don't even want to contemplate where they came from. Hey, Sparky." Lex smiled as Sparky butted his little horns against his palm.
Motioning Lex with a shoulder to open the gate, Clark carried Sparky into his weekend retreat.
"It's like summer camp for rich goats," he said as he put Sparky down, watching as the goat gained his legs and started to complacently chew on the grapevines.
Lex, for his part, ignored his comments. He had followed Clark into the pen and now walked behind the pagoda, grabbing a few blue bottles of water out of the crate. Ignoring Clark's outstretched hand, he opened both of the bottles and poured the water into the blue bowl with "Sparky" written on the side.
"Here you go, Sparky," Lex said. "All the comforts of home."
"Lex, home is a barn and field with water from the hose and pond."
"I guess we could put in a barn and pond..."
"That wasn't what I meant."
Lex took off the glasses, a gleam in his eyes. "I know."
Clark sighed.
"So, do you want to have something to eat, or do you want to have sex?"
Clark considered as they walked into the mansion. "How about sex, food, then sex again?"
"Works for me," Lex grinned. "Do you think if Sparky had chevre in his omelet for breakfast tomorrow, it'd be too much like cannibalism?"
"Lex...."
"Just kidding, Clark," Lex said as he pushed Clark up to a wall and started to suck on his tonsils.
Outside, Sparky munched, ignoring the passionate moans coming from the mansion.
Really, shoveling shit was the same no matter where you did it, Lex decided as he pushed the wheelbarrow. The events of the last few days had put a number of things into perspective, leading Lex to the very strange position of enjoying himself as he worked in the Kent barn. In a little while he'd go in for breakfast and sit at the table with Clark and his parents; Lex had never realized how much tastier muffins were after cleaning out a barn.
Looking over at a bale of hay that his companion was sitting on, eating his own breakfast, Lex smiled and continued to muck the stall. He worked in silence, laying down a covering of clean hay before putting the pitchfork back against the wall.
He hadn't heard him enter the barn, so Lex jumped a little when long, flannel clad arms wrapped around him, pulling him backwards. Lex slipped on a bit of hay and fell againt the strong chest behind him.
"Clark," Lex started as he regained his balance and turned around, "don't do that, not with all the manure around here."
Clark grinned as he looked down, taking in Lex's usual clothes, covered in one of Clark's heavy flannel workshirts against the morning chill. "I missed you when I woke up."
"I thought I better get started before your father came down," Lex replied softly, nipping at Clark's jaw. "I don't think we'd be able to get away with saying I needed to borrow some socks two mornings in a row."
"You look good in my clothes." Lex laughed softly before leaning in for the kiss. Clark's hands were under Lex's sweater, fingers tracing his spine when a bleat from their left got their attention.
"Hey, Sparky," Clark grinned but said no more as he pulled Lex by the flannel around to the stall where bales of hay were already piled, out of sight of the door. Long, slow kisses turned into something more, fingers sliding over muscle, clothes falling onto clean hay.
Lex shifted, settling in atop of Clark, repositioning them on top of the horse blanket. They were still both wearing their socks, but Lex could feel the straw poking through the weave as he tapped his foot on the bale. His fingers kept time on Clark's shoulder as he leaned down for another kiss, licking around the full lips, sliding his tongue inside to taste.
A bleat from the other side of the barn came just before they heard the door slide open.
"Lex, Clark, breakfast." Jonathan called from the door. "Come on, Clark, you're going to be late for school if you don't hurry up."
"Coming, Dad," Clark yelled back, clutching at Lex's bare back as they both held their breath. The door slid shut and Clark squinted in that direction. "He went back to the house," he told Lex, who sighed and rested his forehead against Clark's.
Lex regretfully pulled away as Clark's hands slid from his ass. Quick clean up with some paper towels from the shop bench, the condom hidden in the bottom of the trash can, they re-dressed, checking each other over to make sure they didn't look like they had just spent the last fifteen minutes doing what they had been doing.
Clark was quiet as they got ready head back to the house and Lex turned to him with a raised eyebrow. "Clark, are you okay?"
"You're planning something."
Lex gave him an indulgent look. "Of course I am."
"Lex..."
"It'll be okay, Clark."
There was a scrabbling noise as Sparky hopped down from the bale of hay, coming over to where they stood and bleated at them, pushing Clark toward Lex with his little horns. Lex laughed as C
Clark's arms went around him.
"I want you and Lucas to get along, if that's what you want, Lex."
Lex patted Sparky's head then let his hand curl around Clark's ass to pull him closer. "Don't worry, Clark. There's only one goat I need or want, and it's yours."
"Good," was all Clark needed to say before the kiss. The sound of the screen door slamming against the house caught their attention, and they broke apart, starting toward the door, leaving Sparky to return to his pen.
Muffins, then planning, Lex decided as they climbed the steps to the farmhouse. He'd take care of his family... and keep his goat.
© EAS, April, 2002
Disclaimer: All canon based Smallville characters belong to WB and/or DC Comics.
I am making no money, just enjoying playing in the sandbox.
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